Third Day is one of my favorite bands, but I hadn't heard this song in a while. After listening to it tonight, I realized this is so the soundtrack song to my prayer life right now. It really lyricizes where I'm at with summer project, and leadership. I got the lyrics down and wanted to share them. Check the song out if you haven't heard it at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEn74zP1glQ&feature=youtube_gdata.
My life,
Has led me down the road that's so uncertain
And now I am left alone and I am broken,
Trying to find my way,
Trying to find the faith that's gone
This time,
I know that you are holding all the answers
I'm tired of losing hope and taking chances,
On roads that never seem,
To be the ones that bring me home
Give me a revelation,
Show me what to do
Cause I've been trying to find my way,
I haven't got a clue
Tell me should I stay here,
Or do I need to move
Give me a revelation
I've got nothing without You
I've got nothing without You
My life,
Has led me down this path that's ever winding
Through every twist and turn I'm always finding,
That I am lost again (I am lost again)
Tell me when this road will ever end
Give me a revelation,
Show me what to do
Cause I've been trying to find my way,
I haven't got a clue
Tell me should I stay here,
Or do I need to move
Give me a revelation
I've got nothing without You
I've got nothing without...
I don't know where I can turn
Tell me when will I learn
Won't You show me where I need to go
Oh oh
Let me follow Your lead,
I know that it's the only way that I can get back home
Give me a revelation,
Show me what to do
Cause I've been trying to find my way,
I haven't got a clue
Tell me should I stay here,
Or do I need to move
Give me a revelation
I've got nothing without You
I've got nothing without You
Oh, give me a revelation...
I've got nothing without You
I've got nothing without You
19 May, 2010
18 May, 2010
Crossing the Jordan...
This is going to be long. I'm sorry. If you continue to read what follows, settle in. A friend who's a much more interesting blogger than I am said of her own thoughts, that "...90 percent of what I write on this blog is for what it produces on the inside, and only 10 percent for what it produces on paper." This holds true for me as well. So with that prefaced, I"ll share with you my heart. Read away random blog followers.
As I sit inside the club level lounge of a new, trendy hotel in my home town of Overland Park (yeah, chilling in hotels isn't weird or anything) looking out on the town and trying not to reflect on the fact that had I not changed my major a year ago, I would be graduated right now, I am reading Joshua from the Old Testament. If you know me really well, you know that Joshua is kinda my hero of faith that I really dig and relate to at the moment. I see so many things that God is doing in my life that has prepared me to cross my own Jordan River in the coming weeks and months, and I am daily looking to how Joshua lived life through trusting God's leadership in his life, so that the could lead those in his care.
In 5 days, I will be leaving for Athens, Greece for six weeks to do a ministry project. The thing is, is that I have to raise $2000 in those 5 days. If Athens is the "land that God has promised" with His calling for my life this summer, I have a huge Jordan River to cross before I can get there. But, I am ready, and I am prepared to make the crossing. I know that God is directing my steps, and as I get closer and closer to the river bank, He will provide a way. I mentioned earlier in my blog, that Proverbs 16:9 has been my theme verse over the lat four years as God has prepared me from this awkward and shy boy, into the man and leader He has called me to be. But up until recently, I always knew the verse as God determined our steps (which He absolutely does), but I was shown recently another perspective on this life verse for me. The ESV translation of 16:9 says "In his heart, a man plans his course, but the Lord establishes his steps." I really like the use of 'establishes' here, rather than determines, because while God does determine our steps, He calls us to paths in our heart when we follow them, and then He establishes our way and steps according to the path He has called us to.
As I prepare for Greece, I've been battered with 'what ifs' and Plan B's in regards to support raising. After reading Joshua tonight, I am reaffirmed in my faith that Plan B's aren't in step with faith. Faith is the essence of things hoped for; of things not seen. Going back to the heroes of faith mentioned in Hebrews 11, they didn't have Plan B's. Noah didn't build the Ark with life boats, or even build the thing next to the tallest mountain he could find in case God had given him bad construction plans. Moses didn't lead the people out of Egypt and get to the Red Sea with the intention of soldiering men to fight the pursuing force behind them. Joshua didn't lead the people down to the banks of the Jordan River thinking they could just build a bridge to get across. These guys didn't have back-up plans. They heard God's call for them, they believed, and He established their steps.
I realize that God has led me exactly where I am right now for a reason. As someone who has been exploring the calling of ministry and missions in my life, I look to 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 as an answer to this. But I also have to believe and cling to trusting that God will be glorified through me this summer. He has led me to this place where I have a Red see in front of me, a desert surrounding me, and an army behind me. The amazing thing that I think we forget all too often in the world we live in today, is that the same God who we pray too in our beds, driving our cars, in our safe churches, is the God who parted that sea, stopped that river, even raised a man from the dead, and conquered death Himself!
God asks for us to daily pick up our cross and follow Jesus. To deny ourselves the safety and sure footedness of what we could have in the world, and leap out unto faith that He will catch us. He never tells us when His safe and secure arms will catch us, only that He wont let us hit the ground. I know that when I am at my ropes end within summer, He will catch me.
Ultimately, in one week, I believe that I will be on a plane over the Great Pond right now. While I prayerfully trust Him to establish my steps in Greece, I know He will determine my steps for His glory.
As I sit inside the club level lounge of a new, trendy hotel in my home town of Overland Park (yeah, chilling in hotels isn't weird or anything) looking out on the town and trying not to reflect on the fact that had I not changed my major a year ago, I would be graduated right now, I am reading Joshua from the Old Testament. If you know me really well, you know that Joshua is kinda my hero of faith that I really dig and relate to at the moment. I see so many things that God is doing in my life that has prepared me to cross my own Jordan River in the coming weeks and months, and I am daily looking to how Joshua lived life through trusting God's leadership in his life, so that the could lead those in his care.
In 5 days, I will be leaving for Athens, Greece for six weeks to do a ministry project. The thing is, is that I have to raise $2000 in those 5 days. If Athens is the "land that God has promised" with His calling for my life this summer, I have a huge Jordan River to cross before I can get there. But, I am ready, and I am prepared to make the crossing. I know that God is directing my steps, and as I get closer and closer to the river bank, He will provide a way. I mentioned earlier in my blog, that Proverbs 16:9 has been my theme verse over the lat four years as God has prepared me from this awkward and shy boy, into the man and leader He has called me to be. But up until recently, I always knew the verse as God determined our steps (which He absolutely does), but I was shown recently another perspective on this life verse for me. The ESV translation of 16:9 says "In his heart, a man plans his course, but the Lord establishes his steps." I really like the use of 'establishes' here, rather than determines, because while God does determine our steps, He calls us to paths in our heart when we follow them, and then He establishes our way and steps according to the path He has called us to.
As I prepare for Greece, I've been battered with 'what ifs' and Plan B's in regards to support raising. After reading Joshua tonight, I am reaffirmed in my faith that Plan B's aren't in step with faith. Faith is the essence of things hoped for; of things not seen. Going back to the heroes of faith mentioned in Hebrews 11, they didn't have Plan B's. Noah didn't build the Ark with life boats, or even build the thing next to the tallest mountain he could find in case God had given him bad construction plans. Moses didn't lead the people out of Egypt and get to the Red Sea with the intention of soldiering men to fight the pursuing force behind them. Joshua didn't lead the people down to the banks of the Jordan River thinking they could just build a bridge to get across. These guys didn't have back-up plans. They heard God's call for them, they believed, and He established their steps.
I realize that God has led me exactly where I am right now for a reason. As someone who has been exploring the calling of ministry and missions in my life, I look to 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 as an answer to this. But I also have to believe and cling to trusting that God will be glorified through me this summer. He has led me to this place where I have a Red see in front of me, a desert surrounding me, and an army behind me. The amazing thing that I think we forget all too often in the world we live in today, is that the same God who we pray too in our beds, driving our cars, in our safe churches, is the God who parted that sea, stopped that river, even raised a man from the dead, and conquered death Himself!
God asks for us to daily pick up our cross and follow Jesus. To deny ourselves the safety and sure footedness of what we could have in the world, and leap out unto faith that He will catch us. He never tells us when His safe and secure arms will catch us, only that He wont let us hit the ground. I know that when I am at my ropes end within summer, He will catch me.
Ultimately, in one week, I believe that I will be on a plane over the Great Pond right now. While I prayerfully trust Him to establish my steps in Greece, I know He will determine my steps for His glory.
02 May, 2010
Learning to be Still...
I'm writing something this evening that is completely different than what I had intended to share this weekend. God's been teaching me a lot the last few weeks about leadership, giving, humility (You can see I've been getting quite an education) and I have so much I need to express through these lessons. But as I sit writing this this evening, I am also able to realize that if God had worked things the way I had planned for them to go even half of the time over the last four years, I'd be graduating from college in less than a week. Instead of worrying about summer plans, roommates for this fall, and what classes I still need to get into, I could be worrying a lot more about grad school and seminaries accepting me, careers getting started, living costs, and a whole ton of stuff that I'm thankful that I'm not 'grown up' enough to have to deal with just yet.
Life have been speeding up to 200 miles per hour over the last few weeks, as it tend to do this time of year I guess. And as it's been getting faster and faster, I've become so heavy with feelings of responsibility, provision, and my plans working out with life's big 'to-do's.
Finally, this evening I just couldn't take it anymore. I just needed to get out and clear my head. I took off on a motorcycle ride towards Goshen, AR not intending to go far; a quick jaunt if you will. I quickly found myself trying to work out some frustration and anxiety by pushing the riding experience and twisting the throttle a little more than I should have (don't tell my mom, please), when as I come up to a nice straight-away, I see this quiet little pasture. It was sad knowing that it was waiting to be ruined by more housing development. But for now, it was too picturesque to pass by. I pulled up, parked my bike, and hiked out to it a little ways where I found this little hill, overlooking a gorgeous field of flowers, a glassy, meandering pond, and a backdrop of trees and hills that slapped me into remembering just how beautiful Arkansas is around here.
It was only after quietly sitting down in the grass, that I felt like God's peace come over my heart with all of my weight I've been carrying. I guess it was the kind of thing that is described in Phillipians 4:7 because I remembered the below out of nowhere.
"Be still, and know that I AM God, exalted among the nations." Psalm 46:10
"Trust in the Lord and do what is good; dwell in the land and live securely. Take delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act, making your righteousness shine like the dawn, your justice like the noonday. Be silent before the Lord and wait expectantly for Him." Psalm 37:1-7
It was only after reading these that I realized how much I've been seeking God in everything, but lately I haven't allowed Him any room to do things Hid way. I haven't completely trusted my will and desires to Him. A friend sent me something this week that talked about this with a way wiser perspective than I can convey, and it can be found here: http://profile.purposedriven.com/dailyhope/post.html?contentid=4332. The biggest things I took from this though was this "Genuine surrender says, "Father, if this problem, pain, sickness, or circumstance is needed to fulfill your purpose and glory in my life or in another's life, please don't take it away!"
I read the story in the gospel of where Jesus prays this prayer to God in complete surrendered silence, and it made me realize how seldom I slow down enough during life's speeding by, to simply be quiet, and surrender my situation, circumstances, relationships, and dreams to Him. After all, He never fails, and as Psalm 37:34 says "Put your hope in the Lord and wait on Him; travel steadily along His path and you will inherit the land."
So as I fight thoughts of anxiety about support raising deadlines for Greece this summer, housing for next year, and all of the other things that life demands done, I am renewed to be still, wait for Him, and know that He's got it covered anyway, and His way is what I want.
Life have been speeding up to 200 miles per hour over the last few weeks, as it tend to do this time of year I guess. And as it's been getting faster and faster, I've become so heavy with feelings of responsibility, provision, and my plans working out with life's big 'to-do's.
Finally, this evening I just couldn't take it anymore. I just needed to get out and clear my head. I took off on a motorcycle ride towards Goshen, AR not intending to go far; a quick jaunt if you will. I quickly found myself trying to work out some frustration and anxiety by pushing the riding experience and twisting the throttle a little more than I should have (don't tell my mom, please), when as I come up to a nice straight-away, I see this quiet little pasture. It was sad knowing that it was waiting to be ruined by more housing development. But for now, it was too picturesque to pass by. I pulled up, parked my bike, and hiked out to it a little ways where I found this little hill, overlooking a gorgeous field of flowers, a glassy, meandering pond, and a backdrop of trees and hills that slapped me into remembering just how beautiful Arkansas is around here.
It was only after quietly sitting down in the grass, that I felt like God's peace come over my heart with all of my weight I've been carrying. I guess it was the kind of thing that is described in Phillipians 4:7 because I remembered the below out of nowhere.
"Be still, and know that I AM God, exalted among the nations." Psalm 46:10
"Trust in the Lord and do what is good; dwell in the land and live securely. Take delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act, making your righteousness shine like the dawn, your justice like the noonday. Be silent before the Lord and wait expectantly for Him." Psalm 37:1-7
It was only after reading these that I realized how much I've been seeking God in everything, but lately I haven't allowed Him any room to do things Hid way. I haven't completely trusted my will and desires to Him. A friend sent me something this week that talked about this with a way wiser perspective than I can convey, and it can be found here: http://profile.purposedriven.com/dailyhope/post.html?contentid=4332. The biggest things I took from this though was this "Genuine surrender says, "Father, if this problem, pain, sickness, or circumstance is needed to fulfill your purpose and glory in my life or in another's life, please don't take it away!"
I read the story in the gospel of where Jesus prays this prayer to God in complete surrendered silence, and it made me realize how seldom I slow down enough during life's speeding by, to simply be quiet, and surrender my situation, circumstances, relationships, and dreams to Him. After all, He never fails, and as Psalm 37:34 says "Put your hope in the Lord and wait on Him; travel steadily along His path and you will inherit the land."
So as I fight thoughts of anxiety about support raising deadlines for Greece this summer, housing for next year, and all of the other things that life demands done, I am renewed to be still, wait for Him, and know that He's got it covered anyway, and His way is what I want.
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